Rewriting Herstory

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOM!!!

And also,

Happy St. Patrick's Day.

So, me and one of my good friends had a discussion about if our relationship was healthy. I found an article online yesterday and it really answered a lot of questions. I figured that I would post the article here because I thought that it was relevant. 


6 Signs you're in a healthy relationship
by Brett Blumenthal - Sheer Balance, on Tue Mar 9, 2010 6:18am PST

Not long ago, I published an article about six qualities to admire in others, and the response was extraordinary. I prefaced the article by saying that the six I mentioned were by far not an exhaustive list, but included those traits that seemed especially hard to find. In reading all of the comments, however, I was inspired to write a follow-up list that covers some of the other qualities that I, as well as others, believe to be important when looking for friendships and relationships with others.

Our relationships are vital to our mental well-being. However, toxic relationships can really do a number on our happiness and outlook on life. As a result, it is important to look for individuals who possess qualities that allow for healthy relationships. Although, once again, not an exhaustive list, the qualities listed below are those that should be at the very heart of a healthy relationship. And, just as you would expect your friend, family member or loved one to display these qualities, it is just as important to reciprocate.

Loyalty: Whether it's in friendships or in family, loyalty is truly important to maintain a healthy relationship. All of us are guilty, at one time or another, of making mistakes, having ups and downs, and even displaying some behavior that we may not always be proud of. When we find friends or loved ones who can forgive us and stand by us…even during our worst moments…we should be especially grateful. That said, loyalty should never be taken for granted and we should always be deeply appreciative when it comes our way.

Respect: I once knew an individual who was very opinionated about political topics. She would talk down to people who disagreed with her and would be very disrespectful. Not only did she make people feel stomped on, but she left many disinterested in friendship. Treating others with kindness and the respect they deserve is important in gaining the respect that WE desire. It never feels good to be taken for granted, judged or used and it doesn’t feel good to be talked down to or treated rudely or inappropriately. There will be times that we may not always have full agreement with our friends or loved ones, but respecting them along the way is a must.

Unconditionally There: There is nothing worse than having someone always resurface in your life when they are in need, are looking for something or need a favor. In a culture of “you scratch my back, and I’ll scratch yours,” it is somewhat rare to find those “who just scratch your back,” period. Finding individuals who want you in their lives just because…and not because they want something in return is refreshing and worth holding on to. Those who are generous of heart are to be treasured!

Trustworthy: I once worked with a woman who, within my first week on the job, felt the need to tell me all of the intimate details of the various extra-marital affairs that had occurred with the management of the firm. She was supposedly friends with these people and I have no doubt, was told this information in the most strictest of confidences. How she felt it was appropriate to divulge this information to a new-hire like me, I still have no idea. But, it was her nature to gossip about everyone and everything. If you share something in confidence, you should be able to trust that the information will remain that way.

A Genuine Sounding Board: Taking a genuine interest in what others have to say and really listening to someone is important in developing solid relationships. Letting go of the “me, me, me” and focusing on the other person not only makes the other person feel valued and appreciated, but they feel that they can really talk to someone who cares. Those who take the time to really listen to our thoughts and feelings, and then help us work through difficult times and situations, share our lives at a much deeper level than those who don’t. These are individuals worth hanging on to.

Dependability: I had a friend who frequently would RSVP to small gatherings and then would never show. They never explained…never brought it up…and never apologized. Although this example is somewhat trivial, it still makes the point. Obviously there are times when things come up that prevent individuals from following through on what they promise, but if a friend, co-worker or family member perpetually drops the ball, they may be sending you a message. If a friend says they are going to do something or be somewhere, you should be able to count on them. And, in reciprocation, they you.

Cause for a smile:

I am basically on my Spring Break right now!

All I have to do is some laundry, clean my room, and pack!

And on Friday, I'm in California!

Wooohooo!!!

I have a 4 page paper to write that I haven't started on yet.

Oh well.

I'm tired.

Cause for a smile:

Spring break in a few days!

I'll be in California with my family.

Yay!

Sorry so short... busy busy busy

I've realized that I need to stop confusing reality with stories. 

I mean, I know the difference between the two. I just have to stop applying things that help me write my stories, or happens in my stories, to real life. I figured that is why I'm so frustrated lately.

It's just that people I thought I knew are doing things that I never thought that they would. I need to understand, and I'm not!

I feel as though I am boned, or close to boned on my presentation tomorrow. I have all of my information, I just need a swift kick in the butt to send me on my merry way.

It doesn't help that I feel like I'm getting sick again and my mental state isn't strong enough to want to go through with all of this right now.

I feel like if I get enough of it done tonight then tomorrow I can just clean it up and fix whatever I need to fix.

One step at a time, right?

Cause for a smile:

I actually did get a lot accomplished today.

The one major thing that is glaring me in the face is this presentation.

Well, I have over half a day to get through with it. And then just talk for 20 minutes.

Positive attitude.

Also, I just created a folder that is hanging on my wall. It has SPRING BREAK 2010 written on it.

It is my motivation!

Yay!

But I have a quote for you all. It is something that I try to live by. 

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. - Herm Albright.

Cause for a smile:

I went to a lacrosse game today. Our girls won 15-10. I saw two of my really good friends score. It was exciting.

I also went to a baseball game today. We lost. But I got to see one of my friends get an RBI. As you can tell, I'm not really familiar with baseball terminology. I'm okay with looking like a total goof. 

I got eight hours of sleep last night, and today I felt as though I could conquer the world.

The whole lockdown situation hasn't actually been as effective as I thought it would be. But I do have a few more days. I just have to buckle down. 

I am actually tired right now, so I should be getting to sleep soon. But I have to proofread a story that I'm sending in that is due tomorrow, so I'm staying up a little while longer to do that. 

So, I found myself smiling a lot today. It's because I kept thinking about this guy that I was flirting with last night at the concert. He's a cutie. But I found out today that he was Catholic.

Now, it's not a determining factor in my relationships, but I just thought that it was funny that the last four guys that I've liked, I found out they were Catholic eventually. It's funny because in my first two years at college, I knew a whole one Catholic boy, and now I feel like there are so many.

But I should go.

I have stuff to do before I have to go to sleep.

I know that I'm late at writing a response. Me and one of my good friends had a really long heart to heart since I haven't spoken to her since the summer time.

Today was a pretty simple day.

I guess that the only downside was that I got my test back that I took on Monday. I thought that I did well, but I was wrong. I guess that I just have to study harder next time. 

Cause for a smile:

One of my best friends from high school is actually sitting across from me right now. She is finally here to visit me during her spring break. I's fun seeing her and just having a friend from high school here with me.

My floor is pretty much clean. I vacuumed and my room is cleaner than it has been all semester.

Yay!!!

I'm marking off more things off of my list of things to do, and I'm not adding much.

It's the greatest feeling in the world to just cross things off. 

Actually, right now, I'm pretty tired because we drank.

I guess that I should sleep soon because we're waking up early tomorrow to go shopping, and I didn't take a nap today.

I'm going to sleep now...

Good night.

So, I have a test tomorrow in Human Physiology and I have yet to start studying.

I am pretty sure that isn't a good thing.

I went to church today, but I didn't take my nap after it like I usually do...

Sad days.

It's my fault though because I had to make up the rest of my dance.

And after all of the dancing I did today... I'm exhausted.

Cause for a smile:

I taught most of the second half of my dance for luau. 

That is one less thing to be marking off my list.

Also, I had a singalong on two people's statuses on facebook. Little things like that make me smile.

And finally, I spent 500 dollars today.

Yeah...

I shouldn't have been smiling after it, but I was. 

Oh well.

I guess I should get studying now...

Cause for a smile:

So, I went to sleep at midnight last night, and I woke up for class today full of energy.

Seven hours of sleep.

I needed it after going from nine hours to six hours. 

I feel myself getting better.

But everything still has the sick taste in my mouth and I'm hacking up a lot of mucus. It's better than having it in me, right?

But I need to go shower after sweating from luau practice.

Then finish homework.

And then I can finally go to sleep.

I'm hoping to get over this sickness by the weekend.

By the way, this okay icon at the bottom, isn't really the okay I'm wanting. It looks more content. When I say okay, I mean better than I have in the past few days.

First off,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GGB!!!

So, usually, I try to deny the fact that I'm sick. I'll deny it to the edge of the world and back.

But when you're so sick that it hurts to swallow and you can feel the pain traveling down your chest, being in denial just seems like a waste of energy.

So, I've given in and decided that, yes, I am sick. 

And it sucks.

Because my friend was having a party today, and I couldn't drink. I mean, I did have one shot, which was stupid on my part because I took something for my sickness. 

...is very disappointed with myself.

But I made my way out of there soon after before I made another bad choice.

BTW... I love how the sick emoticon in my mood makes me seem more dead than sick. I mean, seriously. XX for my eyes?

I mean, it's close. I have a sore throat, which makes it hard to swallow, and I have the same pain in my chest. Muscle aches. A headache that was so bad that I felt like my nose needed to bleed for the pressure to be released. 

I can guarantee it's from getting eight hours of sleep to only six (at the most).

Weekend recovery begins now.

Cause for a smile:

I officially survived my first week of school. Yay!

Barely, but surviving is surviving.

Now, I must get to sleep so I can get over this sickness. 

So today was supposed to be my long day in class, but it actually turned out to be pretty easy. I had lab in the morning, then I had an eight hour break, where I took a nap, then I had a night class. 

Usually, the night class is supposed to go to 9:25 at night, but we got out more than an hour early. How great is that?

I'm beginning to like this semester a lot.

And I say that now... but wait, as the semester progresses, I'll slowly lose my mind.

Cause for a smile:

I got out of lab early today. LOVE IT!!!

Also, when I was walking to my night class, I saw two people randomly dancing as they walked back it was hilarious because they didn't care who was watching them.

I wish more people were like that.

I guess I should get to sleep now. Have to wake up at eight tomorrow morning. Yay...

But not really.

Okay, now for some guilty pleasure stuff. 

So, I watch American Idol sporadically. I watched the first few season, then stopped watching since I came up to college.

This season, it was on television before Human Target, which I really wanted to see, so I caught a few of the audition.

Today, I saw Andrew Garcia.

See, now that might not mean anything, but I've watched a few of his videos on youtube and I think he is amazing. He's probably the only reason I'm going to keep up with it this year.

Here is a video of him singing. He's the guy on the left.



Cause for a smile:

I talked to my little brother today. Like actually heard his voice when he called. And he wasn't asking me for anything.

I also saw a few of my friends that I haven't seen all break because they're slowly making their ways back to school since it actually starts next week Monday.

I played volleyball again today. Which is always a fun time.

So, I finished a story today. The thing was that I stayed up until at least 5:00 this morning typing it up. I read over it today to finish it up, and it actually sounded decent. But since I stayed up that late, I took a nap in the middle of the day. And it was glorious.

That being said, I'm working on another story right now.

Like right at this exact moment, my playlist is playing, and a Word document is open.

Good times.