Fic: He Heals Me (1/4)
Mar. 17th, 2010 11:54 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dauntperplexityTitle: He Heals Me (1/4)
Author: DauntPerplexity
Rating: PG 13
Pairing: Dean/Castiel
Spoilers: We’ll just say season 5
Length: 11,719
Summary: “Okay, Mr. Know-it-all,” Dean replied. “Just because you tell me everything.”
Author’s Notes: So, these are just a bunch of one shots that could or could not take place in Dean and Castiel’s relationship. Some stories link, some stand alone. There is no order to these stories. The order is more for the songs themselves.
Also,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOMMY!
1. Falling Slowly – Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova
You have suffered enough
And warred with yourself
It’s time that you won
Take this sinking boat and point it home
We’ve still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice
You’ve made it now
Dean sat in the dark pouring his eleventh shot of the night. He heard the familiar flap of wings, but didn’t move to greet him or acknowledge him.
Castiel stood still for ten minutes and was about to leave, but a soft voice stopped him. “Have a seat, Cas,” Dean said.
Castiel looked around and considered turning on the light, but decided against it. He pulled up the chair and sat across from Dean. “I think you’ve had enough, Dean,” Castiel said, reaching for the bottle.
Dean put a hand on the bottle and pulled it out of Castiel’s reach. “Not yet.” He pulled another shot glass from the side of the table and set it in front of Castiel. “Drink with me.”
“I don’t think—”
“One drink, Cas,” Dean said. “I’ve already poured it for you,” he said as he poured into Castiel’s glass.
“Dean,” Castiel said as the hunter poured a drink into his own glass.
Dean held up his hand to keep him from talking. “To whatever the hell we have to be thankful for in times like these.” He raised his glass and tipped to the angel and waited for him to do the same.
They gulped down their shots and slammed the glasses on the table. Dean then took the bottle and took another swig from it. Castiel grabbed the bottom of the bottle. “That’s enough, Dean,” he said, taking the bottle away from the hunter.
“I’ll tell you when I had enough,” he said, standing up and trying to reach for it.
Castiel held up two fingers to Dean’s forehead then glared at him and dared him to try and reach for the drink again. Dean sat back down, defeated. And then he broke down. “They were just kids, Cas,” he cried, tears falling down his faster than he could stop them.
“I know, Dean.”
“They won’t ever be able to go to their Prom, or get their license, or have their first kiss, or have sex, or graduate.”
“You cannot blame yourself, Dean.”
“I should’ve been faster. Been smarter. I could’ve—”
“What, Dean?” Castiel pressed. He knew that Dean needed to talk about it before he coped.
“I don’t know,” Dean sighed. “Something. Anything. I should’ve said yes—”
“No,” Castiel said quickly. “You made the right choice.”
“Did I, Cas?”
“You did. It’s not over yet.”
“It feels like it.”
“Dean, you’ve made it this far.”
“I don’t know it I’m strong enough to go any further.”
“You are.”
“You hope I am.”
“I know you are.” Castiel stood up and made his way to Dean’s side of the table. He grabbed his arm and threw it around his shoulders. “Come on,” he said. “Let’s get you to bed.”
Dean let the angel move him around and get him to his feet. Dean relinquished all control and allowed Castiel to walk him to his room. “I want to forget, Cas,” Dean mumbled into the angel’s shoulder.
“No, you don’t,” Castiel replied.
“I do.”
“If you forget, then you forget the pain. And then there is nothing to keep you going.” Castiel stopped walking and took in a deep breath. “If you forget, then you can’t remember those you lost.”
Dean sighed. “I don’t want to forget them.”
“I know you don’t.”
“I’m sorry you had to see me like this.”
“It’s all right, Dean.” Castiel began moving again and somehow made it to Dean’s room. He placed Dean on the bed and he was unconscious as soon as his head hit the pillow.
Although he didn’t have much power in him at the moment, Castiel put two fingers to Dean’s forehead to push him further into a deeper, dreamless sleep. With the same touch, Dean’s outer layer of clothes and shoes vanished from his body and appeared on a nearby chair. He grabbed a blanket off of said chair and draped it over Dean’s sleeping form.
He leaned over Dean and placed a soft kiss on his forehead. “You’ll make it, Dean. I’ll make sure of it.”
He stepped back and glanced at Dean for a second. When he saw that Dean was as comfortable as he could make him, he closed his eyes and tried to fly away. When he opened his eyes, he found that he was still in Dean’s room.
He realized that he spent the remainder of his power helping Dean. He turned and walked out of the room, and back into the kitchen.
Since he was grounded temporarily, the least he could was clean up.
2. Realize – Colbie Callait
Take time to realize
Oh-oh, I’m on your side
Didn’t I, didn’t I tell you.
Take time to realize
This all can pass you by
Did I tell you
“Damnit, Cas,” Dean hissed as he pressed a towel to the angel’s bleeding side.
“Why are you angry with me? I don’t know what I did wrong,” Castiel replied, trying to sound his usual powerful self, but ended up sounding weak.
“You’re bleeding,” Dean said. “Sam, grab another towel.”
“You make it sound like I planned this,” the angel said, furrowing his brow.
Dean raised his arm to catch a towel that his brother threw at him. “You might as well have,” Dean said, through gritted teeth.
“I don’t understand why you’re so angry with me, Dean,” Castiel said. “I was just following a lead to find God.”
“That’s just it, Cas,” Dean said. “You followed a lead where ended up having to fight demons. A lot of demons.”
“I’m going to run to the car to grab our second First Aid Kit,” Sam said, realizing that Castiel was going to need a lot more bandages than their first bag supplied. He was out of the room before anyone could protest.
“What if it was a trap?” Dean whispered.
“It wasn’t,” Castiel said, reassuringly.
“But what if it was!” Dean gripped the towel in his hand so tightly that it was shaking. He grabbed Castiel’s hand and put in where his hand was to hold the towel before he stood up. “What if it was a trap, Cas? We can’t come to you if you’re hurt as easily as you can come to us if we’re hurt. If you’re like this we can’t do anything.” He pointed to all of the wounds littering Castiel’s body. “Especially since you’ve lost some of your mojo, you can’t just heal up as easily as before.”
“Dean, I couldn’t have known that I was going to get hurt this badly.”
“Then you’re supposed to haul ass as soon as things started looking bad.” Dean paused, giving Castiel the once over. “But then again, maybe your definition of bad isn’t anything like our definition of bad.
“Dean.” Castiel set the bloodied towel on the bed and he stood up slowly. “Finding God. It’s something I have to do.”
“And why can’t we help you?”
“Because you and your brother are busy with your own mission.”
“That’s bull, Cas. You’re saying that you’re allowed to help us and save our asses over and over again, but we aren’t allowed to do the same?”
Castiel’s eyes widened. He didn’t understand how Dean was always able to find deeper meanings in whatever he said without him meaning to. “I don’t—”
Dean took a few steps to stand toe to toe with Castiel. He put his hands on Castiel’s arms. “You’re one of us, Cas. I… we care about you. And when you show up in our room with more blood on your clothes than in your body, we feel guilty.”
“That’s the last thing that I would want.”
“Good,” Dean replied. “So you’re going to ask us for help once in awhile.”
“If it isn’t too dangerous,” Castiel said, simply.
Both of their attentions turned to the door when Sam walked back in with another bag in tow. “Sit down, so we can stop the bleeding,” Dean said.
He walked Castiel back to the edge of the bed and sat him down. He picked up the towel and pushed it back on the still bleeding wound.
3. The Face – Ryandan
Many times you’ve been close to breaking
Giving up and letting go
Something inside says it’s not over
For every time you fall apart
There’ll be a soul to guide your journey
Castiel had been keeping vigil over the Winchesters for the past four hours. Ever since he transported them back to the motel after disposing of the witches that terrorized the small town, trying to raise some angel for the Apocalypse, he’d sat at the table in the room and watched them.
Sam had been unconscious before they even left the house where they were fighting the demons, so Castiel didn’t expect him to be waking on his own any time soon.
But Dean on the other hand, seemed perfectly fine until his feet touched the motel room floor. Castiel caught him before he fell face first and put him on the bed. Using as much power as he could spare, he searched through Dean’s body for any injuries that could’ve caused him to lose consciousness.
He found none.
It worried him. And it frustrated him. Because it meant all he could do was wait.
Castiel let out a long and loud sigh. As much as he wanted to continue his search for God, he had to wait and make sure that Dean… they were all right.
“You’re still here?” said a bleary voice from the bed.
Castiel quickly shot up from his seat and made his way to Dean’s side. Dean still lay on his stomach with his eyes closed. “Are you all right?”
“‘m fine, Cas. I just need to sleep it off.”
“Okay,” Castiel replied. “I’ll just—”
“Cas?” Dean whispered.
The tone of his voice stopped Castiel from flying off. “Yes, Dean?”
“Tell me that this is worth it,” he said.
“I don’t know what you mean,” Castiel replied.
“This. All of this. The injuries. The fighting. The loss. The everything. Tell me that I’m better off now that if I just said yes to Michael.” Dean sounded like he was going to cry.
Castiel knew that tone of his voice. It was the same tone he used when they spoke in the hospital after the Alastair incident. He remembered how sad and broken Dean sounded. He remembered how it made him feel. “Dean, I—”
“Tell me that everything is going to be okay.”
Castiel stared at Dean, unsure of what to say to him. “Dean,” Castiel whispered.
“Tell me that everything is going to be okay, Cas, and I’ll believe you.”
“I think….” Castiel’s voice trailed off, unsure of what he wanted to say.
“If you believe it, then I’ll believe it.”
“I believe that everything will be okay for you, Dean.”
“And Sam and Bobby?”
“Sam and Bobby too.”
Dean nodded into his pillow. After a few moments of silence, Castiel was sure that he had fallen back asleep. He was about to leave when Dean shifted in his bed. “And what about you?” Dean whispered.
“What?”
“What about you? Will everything be okay for you?”
Castiel blinked a couple of times trying to figure out what Dean had just asked him. He never really thought of an outcome for him for this fight. His main concern since he had rescued him from Hell had been Dean.
He was going to do everything in his now limited power to keep him safe and make sure he accomplished his goals. Whatever they were. He knew from the start that the fate of the world rested in Dean’s hands.
But now more than ever he felt that is own fate sat and waited in the palms of Dean’s hands. He was tied to Dean now more than ever.
“I’ll be okay if you’re okay,” Castiel replied.
Dean opened his eyes for the first time since they’d landed in the motel. “So you believe that you’re going to be okay too, then?”
He never really thought about it that way before. “I guess so,” Castiel whispered.
4. Far Away – Nickelback
On my knees, I’ll ask
Last chance for one last dance
‘Cause with you, I’d withstand
All of Hell to hold your hand
I’d give it all
I’d give for us
Give anything but I won’t give up
Dean hated the role reversal. He would gladly be lying on the bed, injured, if it meant that Castiel was the one sitting on the chair at his bedside, worried. But he was the one planted in the chair, and Castiel was the one lying on his side with his eyes closed, unmoving for the past two and a half hours.
Sam left him alone with the angel, the younger Winchester unable to take the snapping and agitation that radiated off of his brother. Dean appreciated being left alone. He didn’t want to accidentally take his anger out Sam.
The whole situation was new to him, though. It was different. Because usually when Sam was injured, he knew that he was going to be okay, so he could eat, shower, watch TV, do whatever he wanted while he waited for him to wake up. It was all right because he’d dealt with it before, and he knew that his brother would wake up eventually.
He didn’t know if Castiel was going to wake up from this.
For all he knew, the angel could be dying.
He stood up, kicking the chair back. He wanted to punch something. He wanted to scream. But most of all, he wanted Castiel to be okay.
He pulled Castiel’s trenchcoat up to the angel’s neck when he felt a chill in the room.
He was about to walk out of the room to get some fresh air and calm down when he heard a soft plea coming from the bed.
“No.”
Dean rushed back to the bedside and knelt next to Castiel. “Hey, hey.”
Castiel thrashed in the bed, fighting off some invisible foe, kicking off the coat that was covering him. “Leave him alone.”
Dean put a hand on Castiel’s neck and rubbed the underside of the angel’s jaw. “Hey, hey. Cut it out. You’re safe.”
“No.”
“Cas, come back. You’re okay,” Dean continued to say soothingly. “Come back to me.”
“Dean,” Castiel moaned.
“Come back, Cas. I’m right here. I’m here. Just open your eyes.”
“No,” Castiel protested, trying to sink into the pillow.
With Dean’s other hand, he took and rubbed small circles on the back of it with his thumb. “It’s okay. You’re okay.”
He kept talking to Castiel, repeating the comforting phrases over and over again. It was all he felt he could do to calm the angel down.
After what felt like an hour, but was probably only minutes, Castiel finally calmed down and fell back into a peaceful sleep. In that entire time, he never broke contact with the angel at their hands or at his neck. “Come on, Cas,” Dean said.
His knees went numb as he continued to kneel next to the angel. He wanted to stand up and move the chair back so he could sit with the angel and it would be more comfortable for him, but he found that he didn’t have the heart to pull away.
So he stayed.
“Come back.” He paused to calm himself down. “I’d give anything so you didn’t have to go through this,” he said with a sigh. “I’m staying here until you wake up. So you better be awake soon because I can’t feel my legs.”
Part 2
Author: DauntPerplexity
Rating: PG 13
Pairing: Dean/Castiel
Spoilers: We’ll just say season 5
Length: 11,719
Summary: “Okay, Mr. Know-it-all,” Dean replied. “Just because you tell me everything.”
Author’s Notes: So, these are just a bunch of one shots that could or could not take place in Dean and Castiel’s relationship. Some stories link, some stand alone. There is no order to these stories. The order is more for the songs themselves.
Also,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOMMY!
1. Falling Slowly – Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova
You have suffered enough
And warred with yourself
It’s time that you won
Take this sinking boat and point it home
We’ve still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice
You’ve made it now
Dean sat in the dark pouring his eleventh shot of the night. He heard the familiar flap of wings, but didn’t move to greet him or acknowledge him.
Castiel stood still for ten minutes and was about to leave, but a soft voice stopped him. “Have a seat, Cas,” Dean said.
Castiel looked around and considered turning on the light, but decided against it. He pulled up the chair and sat across from Dean. “I think you’ve had enough, Dean,” Castiel said, reaching for the bottle.
Dean put a hand on the bottle and pulled it out of Castiel’s reach. “Not yet.” He pulled another shot glass from the side of the table and set it in front of Castiel. “Drink with me.”
“I don’t think—”
“One drink, Cas,” Dean said. “I’ve already poured it for you,” he said as he poured into Castiel’s glass.
“Dean,” Castiel said as the hunter poured a drink into his own glass.
Dean held up his hand to keep him from talking. “To whatever the hell we have to be thankful for in times like these.” He raised his glass and tipped to the angel and waited for him to do the same.
They gulped down their shots and slammed the glasses on the table. Dean then took the bottle and took another swig from it. Castiel grabbed the bottom of the bottle. “That’s enough, Dean,” he said, taking the bottle away from the hunter.
“I’ll tell you when I had enough,” he said, standing up and trying to reach for it.
Castiel held up two fingers to Dean’s forehead then glared at him and dared him to try and reach for the drink again. Dean sat back down, defeated. And then he broke down. “They were just kids, Cas,” he cried, tears falling down his faster than he could stop them.
“I know, Dean.”
“They won’t ever be able to go to their Prom, or get their license, or have their first kiss, or have sex, or graduate.”
“You cannot blame yourself, Dean.”
“I should’ve been faster. Been smarter. I could’ve—”
“What, Dean?” Castiel pressed. He knew that Dean needed to talk about it before he coped.
“I don’t know,” Dean sighed. “Something. Anything. I should’ve said yes—”
“No,” Castiel said quickly. “You made the right choice.”
“Did I, Cas?”
“You did. It’s not over yet.”
“It feels like it.”
“Dean, you’ve made it this far.”
“I don’t know it I’m strong enough to go any further.”
“You are.”
“You hope I am.”
“I know you are.” Castiel stood up and made his way to Dean’s side of the table. He grabbed his arm and threw it around his shoulders. “Come on,” he said. “Let’s get you to bed.”
Dean let the angel move him around and get him to his feet. Dean relinquished all control and allowed Castiel to walk him to his room. “I want to forget, Cas,” Dean mumbled into the angel’s shoulder.
“No, you don’t,” Castiel replied.
“I do.”
“If you forget, then you forget the pain. And then there is nothing to keep you going.” Castiel stopped walking and took in a deep breath. “If you forget, then you can’t remember those you lost.”
Dean sighed. “I don’t want to forget them.”
“I know you don’t.”
“I’m sorry you had to see me like this.”
“It’s all right, Dean.” Castiel began moving again and somehow made it to Dean’s room. He placed Dean on the bed and he was unconscious as soon as his head hit the pillow.
Although he didn’t have much power in him at the moment, Castiel put two fingers to Dean’s forehead to push him further into a deeper, dreamless sleep. With the same touch, Dean’s outer layer of clothes and shoes vanished from his body and appeared on a nearby chair. He grabbed a blanket off of said chair and draped it over Dean’s sleeping form.
He leaned over Dean and placed a soft kiss on his forehead. “You’ll make it, Dean. I’ll make sure of it.”
He stepped back and glanced at Dean for a second. When he saw that Dean was as comfortable as he could make him, he closed his eyes and tried to fly away. When he opened his eyes, he found that he was still in Dean’s room.
He realized that he spent the remainder of his power helping Dean. He turned and walked out of the room, and back into the kitchen.
Since he was grounded temporarily, the least he could was clean up.
2. Realize – Colbie Callait
Take time to realize
Oh-oh, I’m on your side
Didn’t I, didn’t I tell you.
Take time to realize
This all can pass you by
Did I tell you
“Damnit, Cas,” Dean hissed as he pressed a towel to the angel’s bleeding side.
“Why are you angry with me? I don’t know what I did wrong,” Castiel replied, trying to sound his usual powerful self, but ended up sounding weak.
“You’re bleeding,” Dean said. “Sam, grab another towel.”
“You make it sound like I planned this,” the angel said, furrowing his brow.
Dean raised his arm to catch a towel that his brother threw at him. “You might as well have,” Dean said, through gritted teeth.
“I don’t understand why you’re so angry with me, Dean,” Castiel said. “I was just following a lead to find God.”
“That’s just it, Cas,” Dean said. “You followed a lead where ended up having to fight demons. A lot of demons.”
“I’m going to run to the car to grab our second First Aid Kit,” Sam said, realizing that Castiel was going to need a lot more bandages than their first bag supplied. He was out of the room before anyone could protest.
“What if it was a trap?” Dean whispered.
“It wasn’t,” Castiel said, reassuringly.
“But what if it was!” Dean gripped the towel in his hand so tightly that it was shaking. He grabbed Castiel’s hand and put in where his hand was to hold the towel before he stood up. “What if it was a trap, Cas? We can’t come to you if you’re hurt as easily as you can come to us if we’re hurt. If you’re like this we can’t do anything.” He pointed to all of the wounds littering Castiel’s body. “Especially since you’ve lost some of your mojo, you can’t just heal up as easily as before.”
“Dean, I couldn’t have known that I was going to get hurt this badly.”
“Then you’re supposed to haul ass as soon as things started looking bad.” Dean paused, giving Castiel the once over. “But then again, maybe your definition of bad isn’t anything like our definition of bad.
“Dean.” Castiel set the bloodied towel on the bed and he stood up slowly. “Finding God. It’s something I have to do.”
“And why can’t we help you?”
“Because you and your brother are busy with your own mission.”
“That’s bull, Cas. You’re saying that you’re allowed to help us and save our asses over and over again, but we aren’t allowed to do the same?”
Castiel’s eyes widened. He didn’t understand how Dean was always able to find deeper meanings in whatever he said without him meaning to. “I don’t—”
Dean took a few steps to stand toe to toe with Castiel. He put his hands on Castiel’s arms. “You’re one of us, Cas. I… we care about you. And when you show up in our room with more blood on your clothes than in your body, we feel guilty.”
“That’s the last thing that I would want.”
“Good,” Dean replied. “So you’re going to ask us for help once in awhile.”
“If it isn’t too dangerous,” Castiel said, simply.
Both of their attentions turned to the door when Sam walked back in with another bag in tow. “Sit down, so we can stop the bleeding,” Dean said.
He walked Castiel back to the edge of the bed and sat him down. He picked up the towel and pushed it back on the still bleeding wound.
3. The Face – Ryandan
Many times you’ve been close to breaking
Giving up and letting go
Something inside says it’s not over
For every time you fall apart
There’ll be a soul to guide your journey
Castiel had been keeping vigil over the Winchesters for the past four hours. Ever since he transported them back to the motel after disposing of the witches that terrorized the small town, trying to raise some angel for the Apocalypse, he’d sat at the table in the room and watched them.
Sam had been unconscious before they even left the house where they were fighting the demons, so Castiel didn’t expect him to be waking on his own any time soon.
But Dean on the other hand, seemed perfectly fine until his feet touched the motel room floor. Castiel caught him before he fell face first and put him on the bed. Using as much power as he could spare, he searched through Dean’s body for any injuries that could’ve caused him to lose consciousness.
He found none.
It worried him. And it frustrated him. Because it meant all he could do was wait.
Castiel let out a long and loud sigh. As much as he wanted to continue his search for God, he had to wait and make sure that Dean… they were all right.
“You’re still here?” said a bleary voice from the bed.
Castiel quickly shot up from his seat and made his way to Dean’s side. Dean still lay on his stomach with his eyes closed. “Are you all right?”
“‘m fine, Cas. I just need to sleep it off.”
“Okay,” Castiel replied. “I’ll just—”
“Cas?” Dean whispered.
The tone of his voice stopped Castiel from flying off. “Yes, Dean?”
“Tell me that this is worth it,” he said.
“I don’t know what you mean,” Castiel replied.
“This. All of this. The injuries. The fighting. The loss. The everything. Tell me that I’m better off now that if I just said yes to Michael.” Dean sounded like he was going to cry.
Castiel knew that tone of his voice. It was the same tone he used when they spoke in the hospital after the Alastair incident. He remembered how sad and broken Dean sounded. He remembered how it made him feel. “Dean, I—”
“Tell me that everything is going to be okay.”
Castiel stared at Dean, unsure of what to say to him. “Dean,” Castiel whispered.
“Tell me that everything is going to be okay, Cas, and I’ll believe you.”
“I think….” Castiel’s voice trailed off, unsure of what he wanted to say.
“If you believe it, then I’ll believe it.”
“I believe that everything will be okay for you, Dean.”
“And Sam and Bobby?”
“Sam and Bobby too.”
Dean nodded into his pillow. After a few moments of silence, Castiel was sure that he had fallen back asleep. He was about to leave when Dean shifted in his bed. “And what about you?” Dean whispered.
“What?”
“What about you? Will everything be okay for you?”
Castiel blinked a couple of times trying to figure out what Dean had just asked him. He never really thought of an outcome for him for this fight. His main concern since he had rescued him from Hell had been Dean.
He was going to do everything in his now limited power to keep him safe and make sure he accomplished his goals. Whatever they were. He knew from the start that the fate of the world rested in Dean’s hands.
But now more than ever he felt that is own fate sat and waited in the palms of Dean’s hands. He was tied to Dean now more than ever.
“I’ll be okay if you’re okay,” Castiel replied.
Dean opened his eyes for the first time since they’d landed in the motel. “So you believe that you’re going to be okay too, then?”
He never really thought about it that way before. “I guess so,” Castiel whispered.
4. Far Away – Nickelback
On my knees, I’ll ask
Last chance for one last dance
‘Cause with you, I’d withstand
All of Hell to hold your hand
I’d give it all
I’d give for us
Give anything but I won’t give up
Dean hated the role reversal. He would gladly be lying on the bed, injured, if it meant that Castiel was the one sitting on the chair at his bedside, worried. But he was the one planted in the chair, and Castiel was the one lying on his side with his eyes closed, unmoving for the past two and a half hours.
Sam left him alone with the angel, the younger Winchester unable to take the snapping and agitation that radiated off of his brother. Dean appreciated being left alone. He didn’t want to accidentally take his anger out Sam.
The whole situation was new to him, though. It was different. Because usually when Sam was injured, he knew that he was going to be okay, so he could eat, shower, watch TV, do whatever he wanted while he waited for him to wake up. It was all right because he’d dealt with it before, and he knew that his brother would wake up eventually.
He didn’t know if Castiel was going to wake up from this.
For all he knew, the angel could be dying.
He stood up, kicking the chair back. He wanted to punch something. He wanted to scream. But most of all, he wanted Castiel to be okay.
He pulled Castiel’s trenchcoat up to the angel’s neck when he felt a chill in the room.
He was about to walk out of the room to get some fresh air and calm down when he heard a soft plea coming from the bed.
“No.”
Dean rushed back to the bedside and knelt next to Castiel. “Hey, hey.”
Castiel thrashed in the bed, fighting off some invisible foe, kicking off the coat that was covering him. “Leave him alone.”
Dean put a hand on Castiel’s neck and rubbed the underside of the angel’s jaw. “Hey, hey. Cut it out. You’re safe.”
“No.”
“Cas, come back. You’re okay,” Dean continued to say soothingly. “Come back to me.”
“Dean,” Castiel moaned.
“Come back, Cas. I’m right here. I’m here. Just open your eyes.”
“No,” Castiel protested, trying to sink into the pillow.
With Dean’s other hand, he took and rubbed small circles on the back of it with his thumb. “It’s okay. You’re okay.”
He kept talking to Castiel, repeating the comforting phrases over and over again. It was all he felt he could do to calm the angel down.
After what felt like an hour, but was probably only minutes, Castiel finally calmed down and fell back into a peaceful sleep. In that entire time, he never broke contact with the angel at their hands or at his neck. “Come on, Cas,” Dean said.
His knees went numb as he continued to kneel next to the angel. He wanted to stand up and move the chair back so he could sit with the angel and it would be more comfortable for him, but he found that he didn’t have the heart to pull away.
So he stayed.
“Come back.” He paused to calm himself down. “I’d give anything so you didn’t have to go through this,” he said with a sigh. “I’m staying here until you wake up. So you better be awake soon because I can’t feel my legs.”
Part 2
