dauntperplexity (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
dauntperplexity) wrote2011-10-26 11:11 am
dauntperplexity) wrote2011-10-26 11:11 am
Entry tags:
Fic: Remember What You Told Me (2/4)
Title: Remember What You Told Me (2/4)
Author: DauntPerplexity
Rating: PG 13
Genre: Romance, amnesia
Characters and/or Pairing: Bobby, Sam, Dean/Castiel
Spoilers: Pretty much anything up to the most recent episode.
Warnings: kissing, nudity, mentions of sex
Word Count: This part - 3705; Total - ~12000
Summary: “I’m not supposed to be okay surrounded by a couple of strangers.”
Author’s Note: Fifth in my Vegas!Verse. This comes after Send Out an SOS. This is the second sign of something they have to work through in their marriage. The long italic parts are flashback scenes.
Part 1
Dean had Castiel thrown over his shoulder as he fumbled to open the door to the motel room. Once inside the room, he set Castiel down on his feet. But he fumbled the landing and Castiel fell back against the wall.
Since he and Sam had decided to take a break from each other, Dean indulged and got a room with a king-sized bed. He put some space between him and his husband. He pulled off his jacket and overshirt. He stared at Castiel who had regained his footing and pushed himself off of the wall.
“Dean, what?”
“We just got married, Cas. This is the honeymoon.”
“Dean, I don’t think—”
Dean put a hand up, which stopped Castiel from speaking. “Cas. It’s tradition. We don’t break tradition.”
It was a little difficult for Castiel to understand him because his words were melding together in a way that was only possible with alcohol. “I know nothing of this tradition, Dean.”
Dean sighed. “Sex, Cas.”
Castiel’s eyes widened. “Dean, I don’t think it will work. I’m—”
“You’re what?”
Castiel looked away from his husband’s face and to the ground. “Inexperienced,” he whispered.
“You’re still a virgin? Why don’t you just tap into some of Jimmy’s memories? I mean, I know the body is yours now, but isn’t there still some connection to him?”
“Dean, those are private.”
“But it’s a honeymoon. It’s important.”
“Dean, I can’t do that.”
“What? The tapping into his memories or the honeymoon part.”
“I…”
“You can’t leave your husband on you wedding night. Stay, Cas. Please.”
Castiel looked at his left hand and saw the ring on the marriage finger. Then he looked to Dean who stood in front of him unmoving. As much as everything in him told him that it would be better if he just left Dean to sleep, he couldn’t. “Yes,” he whispered. “Okay.”
Dean smiled and immediately began walking forward.
Even though Castiel thought that he was ready for whatever Dean had in mind, it didn’t stop him from backing away as Dean approached.
In the middle of his dreams, he heard the knocking on the door. He didn’t want to answer it. He never heard it again, and he was sure that whoever it was had left him to sleep in peace.
Instead, the door opened.
“Cas?”
Castiel stretched and groaned on the bed. He wanted to fall back asleep, but he knew that he was awake and staying awake. He looked up and saw Dean standing in the doorway. “Hi.”
“You sleep all right?”
“I wasn’t actually sure I was going to fall asleep.”
“Right. Well, there’s lunch downstairs. Bobby grilled up some burgers.”
Right then, Castiel’s stomach rumbled and was heard throughout the room. “I could use some food.”
“That’s…”
“What?” Castiel asked.
“Not important right now.”
“Later, you’ll tell me.”
“Well, later when you have your memory back, I won’t have to.”
“And if I don’t get them back?”
“Then I’ll tell you everything that you want to know. Come on. Let’s get downstairs. The food’s getting cold.” Dean turned to leave the room, without looking if Castiel was following him.
“If we’re married, tell me how it happened?”
Dean looked and saw that Castiel had maneuvered from lying down to a sitting position on the bed. “What?”
“Tell me exactly what happened.”
“I…” He ran a hand down his face. “I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because I don’t remember.”
“What? How can you not remember?”
Dean walked forward and sat down on the edge of the bed. “I was drunk. It was a Vegas wedding.”
“Vegas? Did you even really want to get married to me?”
“Yeah.” Dean’s face fell. He was offended. “Why would you ask me that?”
“It’s Vegas. Most things done on impulse with much regret.”
“I don’t regret this,” Dean said.
Castiel thought back to his dream. Or memory? He wasn’t sure. But he remembered how much Dean wanted to be with him the night after their wedding, even if he was drunk. “Yeah. Okay.”
“I have a picture of us.” He stood up to grab it, but Castiel grabbed him by the arm to stop him.
Castiel thought back to it and how comfortable Dean looked to be kissing him. “I saw it. I apologize for snooping.”
“Don’t apologize,” Dean said, shaking his head. “It’s your picture as much as it’s mine.”
“I guess it is.” Castiel let out a long sigh.
Dean was sitting on the edge of the bed in an instant. “You okay?”
Castiel was a little surprised at how quickly he was at his side. “I want to remember. I really do. But I just don’t or can’t.”
“It’s okay. We’ll figure this out, Cas,” Dean said putting his hand on Castiel’s knee. Castiel looked down and Dean immediately pulled back like he had touched fire. “Until then, why don’t we get some food into you.”
“Right. Food.”
The two of them walked downstairs with Dean taking the lead. They found Sam and Dean sitting at the kitchen table, already starting on their food.
“Hey, Cas,” Sam said.
“Hi…”
“Sam.”
“Right.”
“How you feeling?” Bobby asked.
“I slept. Still really confused.”
“Still haven’t remembered anything?”
“Not really.”
“Still have the urge to run away?”
“No.”
“Okay, enough interrogation,” Dean said before either of them could say anything else. He saw Sam and Bobby smiled at his protectiveness over his husband. “Why don’t we get some food into you, Cas.” He pulled out a chair and gestured for Castiel to sit in it.
He didn’t think twice before he sat down. “Thanks,” he whispered.
Dean grabbed burgers for the two of them. He set them down and put a plate down in front of Castiel. He took a seat across from him and started to eat. Castiel did the same, even though he wasn’t as hungry as he thought he was back in the room.
The meal was awkward. He kept his eyes down and stared at his plate the entire time. He knew they were staring. He could feel their eyes on him. “I don’t like the silence,” he said, putting down the uneaten half of his burger.
“Well, neither do we,” Sam said with a laugh.
“You don’t have to act any different just because I don’t remember anything.”
“We’re just worried about you,” Sam said after a few moments of silence.
“Well, thank you for your concern, but I am fine. Besides not remembering anything.”
“Okay.”
“But,” he started. He stood up and pushed his chair in. “I’m not that hungry. I think I should just go upstairs and lie down.”
Dean stood up with Castiel. “That’s a good idea.”
“Dean, you don’t have to walk me upstairs.”
“I want to,” Dean said.
Castiel looked to Bobby and Sam for some help, but all they did was shake their heads. He let out a long sigh knowing that he wasn’t going to win against the man. He felt like even in the past, he couldn’t say no to his husband. “Okay,” he whispered. He led the way out of the kitchen feeling Dean following close behind him.
Once they got back up to their room, Casitel sat down on the bed.
Dean stared at Castiel, watching him closely. Minutes passed, and he couldn’t take the silence anymore. “I’ll leave—”
“So, am I good in bed?” he interrupted before he could be left alone.
“What?”
“I mean… there has to be something.”
Dean shook his head and held his hands up. “What are you asking me?”
“Why are we together? I mean, you’re a handsome man. You look like you could easily get a date with anyone. But you’re with me.”
“Really?” Dean said with a forced laugh. “The self-deprecating? I thought that we were over that.”
“It’s not self-deprecating. It’s fact. Dean, you’re very handsome.”
“Thank. But I’m not shallow, Cas. I mean, I was. I definitely used to be. But I want to be with someone that I can spend my life with.”
“And that’s me?”
“Yeah,” Dean said. He sat down next to Castiel. “We are married.” He held up his left hand to emphasize his point.
“You’re okay with being married to someone who doesn’t remember?”
“No, I’m not.” He stood up, not able to be that close to Castiel without being able to touch him. “But I’m staying with you regardless. I figured that we’ve been friends and married longer than you’ve been memory-less.”
“So you’re okay with this because of statistics?”
“No, of course not. I hate numbers. I’m with you because…” his voice trailed off. He rubbed his hand up and down his face a couple of times. “Because I love you.”
“Really?”
“Why do you sound so surprised?”
“Because you sound surprised to say it.”
“I say it all the time,” Dean said, defensive.
Castiel heard the tone and regretted saying what he did. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you.”
“I know you didn’t, Cas,” he said with a deep sigh, immediately forgiving his husband. “Just… I’ll see you when you wake up.” Dean left Castiel alone in the room.
Castiel laid down, staring at the ceiling. He had a lot going through his mind and he wanted to sort through them. He was hoping that another memory would occur before he fell asleep.
He remembered nothing.
Castiel woke up and saw that it was dark out. He looked around for the time and saw that there was no clock in the room. He stood up, blindly trying to make it to the wall for a light switch. He finally found it after knocking over a few things in the room.
When he finally found the light switch, he looked back at the room and saw his path of destruction. He saw a cell phone on the nightstand and looked at it. He saw that it was one in the morning. He had slept for more than ten hours. He was surprised that he wasn’t hungry again.
He opened the door and saw that the lights downstairs were still on. He walked down the stairs slowly when he heard voices. He heard the sound of a book shut.
“What do we do?” Dean asked.
“I don’t know,” Bobby replied.
“Bobby.”
“Well, first we have to make sure that he doesn’t leave,” Sam answered.
“He won’t. Where else will he go?” Dean asked.
“I don’t know, Dean. But he zapped over here, who knows where else he can zap to.”
“We can use the oil.”
“No, we can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because he doesn’t remember that he’s an angel and you’d be keeping him in a circle of fire. What if he tries to step out of the circle?”
Castiel was confused by what they were saying by him. He still continued down the stairs as slowly and quietly as he could.
“Well, what do you expect me to do? My husband doesn’t remember that he’s married to me.”
“Well, now you know how he felt after your wedding,” Sam said with a laugh. Bobby and Dean sent a glare his way. “Sorry, too soon for jokes.”
“What are we going to do?” Dean sounded tired, almost as if he he’d asked that question many times earlier.
“Just wait for him to regain his memories?”
“Maybe there’s a spell, or an incantation or something that can help him.”
“Dean, you don’t even know what did this to him, and you’re going to just cast a bunch of spells on him hoping that something works?”
“Spells?” he whispered to himself. He hid himself behind a wall that lead to a study where the three men were.
“I can’t just sit here doing nothing.”
“You aren’t doing nothing. Let’s just do some research and try to figure it out.”
“But what about him?”
“I don’t know, Dean. Why don’t you go kiss him, or something? Maybe that will jog his memory.” Sam laughed at the red that painted Dean’s cheeks. He was going to say more to rile his brother up, but his eyes widened and he quickly stood up when he made eye contact with Castiel. “Cas.”
Dean and Bobby both stood up too. They ignored when one of the chairs fell over and hit the floor. “You’re awake,” Dean said.
“Yeah. I didn’t realize how tired I was.”
“You hungry?” Dean asked.
“No. I’m not. I know that I should be. But I’m not.”
“We’ll leave you two alone,” Bobby said.
“It’s all right, Bobby,” Castiel replied. “You don’t have to do that.”
“We do.” He patted Sam on the shoulder. “Let’s go.” The two of them made their way out of the study as fast as they could, leaving the married couple alone.
Dean sat down on the desk and crossed his arms across his chest. Castiel stood as far as he could from the man without leaving the room. “How much did you hear?” Dean asked.
“Nothing.”
Dean couldn’t help but smile. “It’s weird hearing a lie from you.”
“Dean.”
“Cas, I’m not mad. How much did you hear?” he repeated.
“Just… some things. Weird things. Enough things.”
Dean stood up and closed the space between him and Castiel. “You’re not freaking out?”
“A little. But it makes sense. I think.”
“Really?” Dean asked. He sounded genuinely surprised.
“There had to be a reason why I wasn’t hungry. And why I could teleport or zap or whatever you called it. And why I can’t feel my bruise.” Castiel whispered the last statement, hoping that Dean wouldn’t hear it. From spending only a day with him, he knew that Dean was protective of him.
He should have spoken softer. Or just not mentioned that part at all.
“What bruise?”
He opened his mouth, contemplating telling Dean a lie. But he couldn’t. If he tried, Dean would see right through it, and it would just be a waste of energy from the both of them. “My… my entire left side is purple.”
“What?”
Castiel lifted up his shirt, making sure he kept his gaze away from Dean. “My left side is purple.”
Dean stood right in front of Castiel, taking the shirt out of his husband’s hand and lifting it up gently. “Cas.”
Castiel pushed Dean’s hands away. “It’s okay. I can’t feel it.” He pulled his shirt down again, covering up.
Dean glared at Castiel, and lifted his shirt back up. “What if something’s broken?”
“I would know, wouldn’t I?” He was more hopeful than sure.
“No, you wouldn’t. Because if you can’t feel it—”
“Do you always worry this much?” Castiel interrupted and sighed.
“Yes,” Bobby and Sam said from the kitchen.
“Stay out of it,” Dean yelled.
“Dean, don’t worry,” Castiel replied, putting a hand on Dean’s. “Please.”
“Can I at least get you some ice? So it doesn’t look as bad as it does.”
“Do I have a choice?”
“Not really,” all three men in the house said at the same time.
“I’ll wait here.”
Dean put his hand over Castiel’s and patted it twice. He walked into the kitchen and saw Bobby and Sam sitting at the dining room table. “Don’t say it,” he said, walking straight to the freezer. He slammed it shut when he realized that he still needed to get a bag to put the ice in.
He spun around and saw Sam standing next to him with a Ziploc bag. “Dean, I know it’s hard for you to see someone hurt and lost and not be able to help.”
“Sam, shut up,” he said snatching the bag from his brother.
“But we’ll find a way to fix this.”
“I know, Sam.” He filled the bag with as much ice as could fit. “Let’s just make it sooner than later, all right?” He shut the freezer door and grabbed a dishtowel before he headed back into the study.
He found Castiel standing behind Bobby’s desk looking through all of the books behind it. He cleared his throat to warn Castiel that someone was in the room with him. Castiel spun back around. “Sit.”
Castiel sat down on the desk in front of Dean. “Those are some interesting books that Bobby has.”
Dean let out a laugh. “You still suck at small talk.”
“I guess some things never change.”
“Lucky me,” Dean said. “Lift up your shirt.”
Castiel pulled up his shirt and looked away from Dean. Some time passed and he realized that Dean still hadn’t put the ice on him. “Is something wrong?”
“I need to get more ice,” he replied. “It slipped my mind how big the bruise was.”
“It’s enough,” Castiel said, grabbing Dean’s wrist. “Just put it on the worst looking part and we’ll worry about the rest of if later.”
“It all looks bad.”
“Well, we’ll start with the ribs first.”
Dean wrapped the bag in the washcloth and was about to press it to Castiel’s skin but stopped. “We should move you somewhere more comfortable. Let’s head to the living room.” Dean held his husband by his upper arm and led him. He sat him down on he couch. He lifted up Castiel’s shirt, wincing as if he felt the pain that his husband should have been feeling. “Ready?” he asked.
“Yes,” Castiel replied.
Dean gently held the bag of ice against Castiel’s ribs. “Hold it here.”
“How long?”
“I’ll tell you when it’s long enough.”
Castiel leaned back and looked at the ceiling while Dean went off doing something else.
Fifteen minutes later, he felt two hands on his. He sat up and saw Dean sitting next to him. He wondered why he didn’t notice that another man was in the room.
Dean pulled the ice off of Castiel’s chest and pulled the shirt down to cover him. “We’ll get another bag and then you have to hold it again for fifteen more minutes.”
“Something’s wrong,” he whispered. The instant he said those words, he knew that he had chosen them wrong.
Dean’s eyes widened as he scooted closer to Castiel, grabbing at the hem of his shirt. “What?”
“Dean, stop,” Castiel said, fighting with the other man to keep his shirt down.
“Cas.”
“I’m not hurt. That was a really bad choice of words for me to say just now.”
“So what’s wrong?”
“This whole situation.” He sighed and Dean moved away, putting some space between them. “I’m not supposed to be okay surrounded by a couple of strangers. I’m supposed to want to run away, or try and find my family or something.”
“I am—”
Castiel continued as if Dean hadn’t said anything. “But I feel safe with you. And I don’t know why. Your life sounds chaotic. I should want to run away as fast as I can.”
“But…”
“I can’t. The flashes I get all have you in them somehow.”
“Flashes. Like you remember something?” Castiel nodded. “Flashes of what?
“Um…” his voice trailed off. He wasn’t sure he really wanted to tell Dean what he’d been seeing. But Dean was looking at him with those eyes and he knew he just had to tell him. “The honeymoon?”
Dean sat back on the couch. “Oh.”
“Nothing pornographic,” Castiel said quickly. “It’s mostly just the moments in between. They’re nice.”
Dean scratched the back of his head, nervous. “Good to know.” He waited for Castiel to say something since he had nothing else to add. Seconds of silence turned into minutes and neither of them could take it.
Lucky for the both of them, Bobby and Sam came into the room. “I’m beat,” Bobby said.
“Me too,” Sam replied. “I think it’s time to go to sleep.”
“Oh. I—”
“You can stay down here and read or something,” Dean interrupted.
“Where will you sleep?”
“I can sleep on the couch.”
“Why not the bed?” Castiel asked. “You can use the bed.”
“You’re sleeping there,” Dean replied.
“I’m probably not going to sleep for awhile.” He had been sleeping almost all day.
“But if you get tired…”
“Dean.”
“Cas, the couch is fine.”
Castiel swore to himself that he would win an argument with Dean before he got in memory back. “I’ll move to the kitchen.”
“Take your time. I should shower anyway.” He stood up and grabbed the bag of ice that he put on the coffee table. “I’ll fill this with more ice and then you have to ice yourself for fifteen more minutes.”
“Okay.”
Dean went toward the kitchen while Sam and Bobby headed upstairs. Dean returned and handed the wrapped ice back to Castiel. “I’ll be upstairs if you need anything.”
“I’ll be fine.”
Dean made his way upstairs leaving Castiel alone.
Castiel held the ice to his ribs and the cold and numbness spread throughout his side. He saw a few books on the coffee table and tugged one of them toward him. He opened the book and flipped to a page. He started reading through it. It was a book about spells and witches.
He heard doors open and close upstairs. He tried not to eavesdrop, but the brothers didn’t whisper as softly as they liked to think they did. “Dean, it’ll be okay.”
“You don’t know that, Sam.”
“I do, Dean,” Sam said confidently. “It’s you and Cas. You’ll figure it out.”
“I just… I just want to kiss my husband.”
“You’re such a girl,” Sam laughed.
“Shut up. Good night, Sam.”
Fifteen minutes passed and he was done icing. He stood up, took the book he was reading with him, and went into the kitchen. He put the book on the dining table and put the bag of ice in the sink. He sat down and started reading where he left off.
Not much after, he heard footsteps coming down the stairs. He saw Dean, wearing only a shirt and boxers, and carrying a pillow and blanket with him.
Dean set up a place to sleep on the couch. He sat down and turned on the TV. Half an hour later, he fell asleep.
Castiel stayed up reading until the sun came up. At about six o’clock, he grabbed the book and brought it back upstairs with him. He fell asleep reading about rabbits’ feet.
Part 3
Author: DauntPerplexity
Rating: PG 13
Genre: Romance, amnesia
Characters and/or Pairing: Bobby, Sam, Dean/Castiel
Spoilers: Pretty much anything up to the most recent episode.
Warnings: kissing, nudity, mentions of sex
Word Count: This part - 3705; Total - ~12000
Summary: “I’m not supposed to be okay surrounded by a couple of strangers.”
Author’s Note: Fifth in my Vegas!Verse. This comes after Send Out an SOS. This is the second sign of something they have to work through in their marriage. The long italic parts are flashback scenes.
Part 1
Dean had Castiel thrown over his shoulder as he fumbled to open the door to the motel room. Once inside the room, he set Castiel down on his feet. But he fumbled the landing and Castiel fell back against the wall.
Since he and Sam had decided to take a break from each other, Dean indulged and got a room with a king-sized bed. He put some space between him and his husband. He pulled off his jacket and overshirt. He stared at Castiel who had regained his footing and pushed himself off of the wall.
“Dean, what?”
“We just got married, Cas. This is the honeymoon.”
“Dean, I don’t think—”
Dean put a hand up, which stopped Castiel from speaking. “Cas. It’s tradition. We don’t break tradition.”
It was a little difficult for Castiel to understand him because his words were melding together in a way that was only possible with alcohol. “I know nothing of this tradition, Dean.”
Dean sighed. “Sex, Cas.”
Castiel’s eyes widened. “Dean, I don’t think it will work. I’m—”
“You’re what?”
Castiel looked away from his husband’s face and to the ground. “Inexperienced,” he whispered.
“You’re still a virgin? Why don’t you just tap into some of Jimmy’s memories? I mean, I know the body is yours now, but isn’t there still some connection to him?”
“Dean, those are private.”
“But it’s a honeymoon. It’s important.”
“Dean, I can’t do that.”
“What? The tapping into his memories or the honeymoon part.”
“I…”
“You can’t leave your husband on you wedding night. Stay, Cas. Please.”
Castiel looked at his left hand and saw the ring on the marriage finger. Then he looked to Dean who stood in front of him unmoving. As much as everything in him told him that it would be better if he just left Dean to sleep, he couldn’t. “Yes,” he whispered. “Okay.”
Dean smiled and immediately began walking forward.
Even though Castiel thought that he was ready for whatever Dean had in mind, it didn’t stop him from backing away as Dean approached.
In the middle of his dreams, he heard the knocking on the door. He didn’t want to answer it. He never heard it again, and he was sure that whoever it was had left him to sleep in peace.
Instead, the door opened.
“Cas?”
Castiel stretched and groaned on the bed. He wanted to fall back asleep, but he knew that he was awake and staying awake. He looked up and saw Dean standing in the doorway. “Hi.”
“You sleep all right?”
“I wasn’t actually sure I was going to fall asleep.”
“Right. Well, there’s lunch downstairs. Bobby grilled up some burgers.”
Right then, Castiel’s stomach rumbled and was heard throughout the room. “I could use some food.”
“That’s…”
“What?” Castiel asked.
“Not important right now.”
“Later, you’ll tell me.”
“Well, later when you have your memory back, I won’t have to.”
“And if I don’t get them back?”
“Then I’ll tell you everything that you want to know. Come on. Let’s get downstairs. The food’s getting cold.” Dean turned to leave the room, without looking if Castiel was following him.
“If we’re married, tell me how it happened?”
Dean looked and saw that Castiel had maneuvered from lying down to a sitting position on the bed. “What?”
“Tell me exactly what happened.”
“I…” He ran a hand down his face. “I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because I don’t remember.”
“What? How can you not remember?”
Dean walked forward and sat down on the edge of the bed. “I was drunk. It was a Vegas wedding.”
“Vegas? Did you even really want to get married to me?”
“Yeah.” Dean’s face fell. He was offended. “Why would you ask me that?”
“It’s Vegas. Most things done on impulse with much regret.”
“I don’t regret this,” Dean said.
Castiel thought back to his dream. Or memory? He wasn’t sure. But he remembered how much Dean wanted to be with him the night after their wedding, even if he was drunk. “Yeah. Okay.”
“I have a picture of us.” He stood up to grab it, but Castiel grabbed him by the arm to stop him.
Castiel thought back to it and how comfortable Dean looked to be kissing him. “I saw it. I apologize for snooping.”
“Don’t apologize,” Dean said, shaking his head. “It’s your picture as much as it’s mine.”
“I guess it is.” Castiel let out a long sigh.
Dean was sitting on the edge of the bed in an instant. “You okay?”
Castiel was a little surprised at how quickly he was at his side. “I want to remember. I really do. But I just don’t or can’t.”
“It’s okay. We’ll figure this out, Cas,” Dean said putting his hand on Castiel’s knee. Castiel looked down and Dean immediately pulled back like he had touched fire. “Until then, why don’t we get some food into you.”
“Right. Food.”
The two of them walked downstairs with Dean taking the lead. They found Sam and Dean sitting at the kitchen table, already starting on their food.
“Hey, Cas,” Sam said.
“Hi…”
“Sam.”
“Right.”
“How you feeling?” Bobby asked.
“I slept. Still really confused.”
“Still haven’t remembered anything?”
“Not really.”
“Still have the urge to run away?”
“No.”
“Okay, enough interrogation,” Dean said before either of them could say anything else. He saw Sam and Bobby smiled at his protectiveness over his husband. “Why don’t we get some food into you, Cas.” He pulled out a chair and gestured for Castiel to sit in it.
He didn’t think twice before he sat down. “Thanks,” he whispered.
Dean grabbed burgers for the two of them. He set them down and put a plate down in front of Castiel. He took a seat across from him and started to eat. Castiel did the same, even though he wasn’t as hungry as he thought he was back in the room.
The meal was awkward. He kept his eyes down and stared at his plate the entire time. He knew they were staring. He could feel their eyes on him. “I don’t like the silence,” he said, putting down the uneaten half of his burger.
“Well, neither do we,” Sam said with a laugh.
“You don’t have to act any different just because I don’t remember anything.”
“We’re just worried about you,” Sam said after a few moments of silence.
“Well, thank you for your concern, but I am fine. Besides not remembering anything.”
“Okay.”
“But,” he started. He stood up and pushed his chair in. “I’m not that hungry. I think I should just go upstairs and lie down.”
Dean stood up with Castiel. “That’s a good idea.”
“Dean, you don’t have to walk me upstairs.”
“I want to,” Dean said.
Castiel looked to Bobby and Sam for some help, but all they did was shake their heads. He let out a long sigh knowing that he wasn’t going to win against the man. He felt like even in the past, he couldn’t say no to his husband. “Okay,” he whispered. He led the way out of the kitchen feeling Dean following close behind him.
Once they got back up to their room, Casitel sat down on the bed.
Dean stared at Castiel, watching him closely. Minutes passed, and he couldn’t take the silence anymore. “I’ll leave—”
“So, am I good in bed?” he interrupted before he could be left alone.
“What?”
“I mean… there has to be something.”
Dean shook his head and held his hands up. “What are you asking me?”
“Why are we together? I mean, you’re a handsome man. You look like you could easily get a date with anyone. But you’re with me.”
“Really?” Dean said with a forced laugh. “The self-deprecating? I thought that we were over that.”
“It’s not self-deprecating. It’s fact. Dean, you’re very handsome.”
“Thank. But I’m not shallow, Cas. I mean, I was. I definitely used to be. But I want to be with someone that I can spend my life with.”
“And that’s me?”
“Yeah,” Dean said. He sat down next to Castiel. “We are married.” He held up his left hand to emphasize his point.
“You’re okay with being married to someone who doesn’t remember?”
“No, I’m not.” He stood up, not able to be that close to Castiel without being able to touch him. “But I’m staying with you regardless. I figured that we’ve been friends and married longer than you’ve been memory-less.”
“So you’re okay with this because of statistics?”
“No, of course not. I hate numbers. I’m with you because…” his voice trailed off. He rubbed his hand up and down his face a couple of times. “Because I love you.”
“Really?”
“Why do you sound so surprised?”
“Because you sound surprised to say it.”
“I say it all the time,” Dean said, defensive.
Castiel heard the tone and regretted saying what he did. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you.”
“I know you didn’t, Cas,” he said with a deep sigh, immediately forgiving his husband. “Just… I’ll see you when you wake up.” Dean left Castiel alone in the room.
Castiel laid down, staring at the ceiling. He had a lot going through his mind and he wanted to sort through them. He was hoping that another memory would occur before he fell asleep.
He remembered nothing.
LRLRLRLRLRLRLR
Castiel woke up and saw that it was dark out. He looked around for the time and saw that there was no clock in the room. He stood up, blindly trying to make it to the wall for a light switch. He finally found it after knocking over a few things in the room.
When he finally found the light switch, he looked back at the room and saw his path of destruction. He saw a cell phone on the nightstand and looked at it. He saw that it was one in the morning. He had slept for more than ten hours. He was surprised that he wasn’t hungry again.
He opened the door and saw that the lights downstairs were still on. He walked down the stairs slowly when he heard voices. He heard the sound of a book shut.
“What do we do?” Dean asked.
“I don’t know,” Bobby replied.
“Bobby.”
“Well, first we have to make sure that he doesn’t leave,” Sam answered.
“He won’t. Where else will he go?” Dean asked.
“I don’t know, Dean. But he zapped over here, who knows where else he can zap to.”
“We can use the oil.”
“No, we can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because he doesn’t remember that he’s an angel and you’d be keeping him in a circle of fire. What if he tries to step out of the circle?”
Castiel was confused by what they were saying by him. He still continued down the stairs as slowly and quietly as he could.
“Well, what do you expect me to do? My husband doesn’t remember that he’s married to me.”
“Well, now you know how he felt after your wedding,” Sam said with a laugh. Bobby and Dean sent a glare his way. “Sorry, too soon for jokes.”
“What are we going to do?” Dean sounded tired, almost as if he he’d asked that question many times earlier.
“Just wait for him to regain his memories?”
“Maybe there’s a spell, or an incantation or something that can help him.”
“Dean, you don’t even know what did this to him, and you’re going to just cast a bunch of spells on him hoping that something works?”
“Spells?” he whispered to himself. He hid himself behind a wall that lead to a study where the three men were.
“I can’t just sit here doing nothing.”
“You aren’t doing nothing. Let’s just do some research and try to figure it out.”
“But what about him?”
“I don’t know, Dean. Why don’t you go kiss him, or something? Maybe that will jog his memory.” Sam laughed at the red that painted Dean’s cheeks. He was going to say more to rile his brother up, but his eyes widened and he quickly stood up when he made eye contact with Castiel. “Cas.”
Dean and Bobby both stood up too. They ignored when one of the chairs fell over and hit the floor. “You’re awake,” Dean said.
“Yeah. I didn’t realize how tired I was.”
“You hungry?” Dean asked.
“No. I’m not. I know that I should be. But I’m not.”
“We’ll leave you two alone,” Bobby said.
“It’s all right, Bobby,” Castiel replied. “You don’t have to do that.”
“We do.” He patted Sam on the shoulder. “Let’s go.” The two of them made their way out of the study as fast as they could, leaving the married couple alone.
Dean sat down on the desk and crossed his arms across his chest. Castiel stood as far as he could from the man without leaving the room. “How much did you hear?” Dean asked.
“Nothing.”
Dean couldn’t help but smile. “It’s weird hearing a lie from you.”
“Dean.”
“Cas, I’m not mad. How much did you hear?” he repeated.
“Just… some things. Weird things. Enough things.”
Dean stood up and closed the space between him and Castiel. “You’re not freaking out?”
“A little. But it makes sense. I think.”
“Really?” Dean asked. He sounded genuinely surprised.
“There had to be a reason why I wasn’t hungry. And why I could teleport or zap or whatever you called it. And why I can’t feel my bruise.” Castiel whispered the last statement, hoping that Dean wouldn’t hear it. From spending only a day with him, he knew that Dean was protective of him.
He should have spoken softer. Or just not mentioned that part at all.
“What bruise?”
He opened his mouth, contemplating telling Dean a lie. But he couldn’t. If he tried, Dean would see right through it, and it would just be a waste of energy from the both of them. “My… my entire left side is purple.”
“What?”
Castiel lifted up his shirt, making sure he kept his gaze away from Dean. “My left side is purple.”
Dean stood right in front of Castiel, taking the shirt out of his husband’s hand and lifting it up gently. “Cas.”
Castiel pushed Dean’s hands away. “It’s okay. I can’t feel it.” He pulled his shirt down again, covering up.
Dean glared at Castiel, and lifted his shirt back up. “What if something’s broken?”
“I would know, wouldn’t I?” He was more hopeful than sure.
“No, you wouldn’t. Because if you can’t feel it—”
“Do you always worry this much?” Castiel interrupted and sighed.
“Yes,” Bobby and Sam said from the kitchen.
“Stay out of it,” Dean yelled.
“Dean, don’t worry,” Castiel replied, putting a hand on Dean’s. “Please.”
“Can I at least get you some ice? So it doesn’t look as bad as it does.”
“Do I have a choice?”
“Not really,” all three men in the house said at the same time.
“I’ll wait here.”
Dean put his hand over Castiel’s and patted it twice. He walked into the kitchen and saw Bobby and Sam sitting at the dining room table. “Don’t say it,” he said, walking straight to the freezer. He slammed it shut when he realized that he still needed to get a bag to put the ice in.
He spun around and saw Sam standing next to him with a Ziploc bag. “Dean, I know it’s hard for you to see someone hurt and lost and not be able to help.”
“Sam, shut up,” he said snatching the bag from his brother.
“But we’ll find a way to fix this.”
“I know, Sam.” He filled the bag with as much ice as could fit. “Let’s just make it sooner than later, all right?” He shut the freezer door and grabbed a dishtowel before he headed back into the study.
He found Castiel standing behind Bobby’s desk looking through all of the books behind it. He cleared his throat to warn Castiel that someone was in the room with him. Castiel spun back around. “Sit.”
Castiel sat down on the desk in front of Dean. “Those are some interesting books that Bobby has.”
Dean let out a laugh. “You still suck at small talk.”
“I guess some things never change.”
“Lucky me,” Dean said. “Lift up your shirt.”
Castiel pulled up his shirt and looked away from Dean. Some time passed and he realized that Dean still hadn’t put the ice on him. “Is something wrong?”
“I need to get more ice,” he replied. “It slipped my mind how big the bruise was.”
“It’s enough,” Castiel said, grabbing Dean’s wrist. “Just put it on the worst looking part and we’ll worry about the rest of if later.”
“It all looks bad.”
“Well, we’ll start with the ribs first.”
Dean wrapped the bag in the washcloth and was about to press it to Castiel’s skin but stopped. “We should move you somewhere more comfortable. Let’s head to the living room.” Dean held his husband by his upper arm and led him. He sat him down on he couch. He lifted up Castiel’s shirt, wincing as if he felt the pain that his husband should have been feeling. “Ready?” he asked.
“Yes,” Castiel replied.
Dean gently held the bag of ice against Castiel’s ribs. “Hold it here.”
“How long?”
“I’ll tell you when it’s long enough.”
Castiel leaned back and looked at the ceiling while Dean went off doing something else.
Fifteen minutes later, he felt two hands on his. He sat up and saw Dean sitting next to him. He wondered why he didn’t notice that another man was in the room.
Dean pulled the ice off of Castiel’s chest and pulled the shirt down to cover him. “We’ll get another bag and then you have to hold it again for fifteen more minutes.”
“Something’s wrong,” he whispered. The instant he said those words, he knew that he had chosen them wrong.
Dean’s eyes widened as he scooted closer to Castiel, grabbing at the hem of his shirt. “What?”
“Dean, stop,” Castiel said, fighting with the other man to keep his shirt down.
“Cas.”
“I’m not hurt. That was a really bad choice of words for me to say just now.”
“So what’s wrong?”
“This whole situation.” He sighed and Dean moved away, putting some space between them. “I’m not supposed to be okay surrounded by a couple of strangers. I’m supposed to want to run away, or try and find my family or something.”
“I am—”
Castiel continued as if Dean hadn’t said anything. “But I feel safe with you. And I don’t know why. Your life sounds chaotic. I should want to run away as fast as I can.”
“But…”
“I can’t. The flashes I get all have you in them somehow.”
“Flashes. Like you remember something?” Castiel nodded. “Flashes of what?
“Um…” his voice trailed off. He wasn’t sure he really wanted to tell Dean what he’d been seeing. But Dean was looking at him with those eyes and he knew he just had to tell him. “The honeymoon?”
Dean sat back on the couch. “Oh.”
“Nothing pornographic,” Castiel said quickly. “It’s mostly just the moments in between. They’re nice.”
Dean scratched the back of his head, nervous. “Good to know.” He waited for Castiel to say something since he had nothing else to add. Seconds of silence turned into minutes and neither of them could take it.
Lucky for the both of them, Bobby and Sam came into the room. “I’m beat,” Bobby said.
“Me too,” Sam replied. “I think it’s time to go to sleep.”
“Oh. I—”
“You can stay down here and read or something,” Dean interrupted.
“Where will you sleep?”
“I can sleep on the couch.”
“Why not the bed?” Castiel asked. “You can use the bed.”
“You’re sleeping there,” Dean replied.
“I’m probably not going to sleep for awhile.” He had been sleeping almost all day.
“But if you get tired…”
“Dean.”
“Cas, the couch is fine.”
Castiel swore to himself that he would win an argument with Dean before he got in memory back. “I’ll move to the kitchen.”
“Take your time. I should shower anyway.” He stood up and grabbed the bag of ice that he put on the coffee table. “I’ll fill this with more ice and then you have to ice yourself for fifteen more minutes.”
“Okay.”
Dean went toward the kitchen while Sam and Bobby headed upstairs. Dean returned and handed the wrapped ice back to Castiel. “I’ll be upstairs if you need anything.”
“I’ll be fine.”
Dean made his way upstairs leaving Castiel alone.
Castiel held the ice to his ribs and the cold and numbness spread throughout his side. He saw a few books on the coffee table and tugged one of them toward him. He opened the book and flipped to a page. He started reading through it. It was a book about spells and witches.
He heard doors open and close upstairs. He tried not to eavesdrop, but the brothers didn’t whisper as softly as they liked to think they did. “Dean, it’ll be okay.”
“You don’t know that, Sam.”
“I do, Dean,” Sam said confidently. “It’s you and Cas. You’ll figure it out.”
“I just… I just want to kiss my husband.”
“You’re such a girl,” Sam laughed.
“Shut up. Good night, Sam.”
Fifteen minutes passed and he was done icing. He stood up, took the book he was reading with him, and went into the kitchen. He put the book on the dining table and put the bag of ice in the sink. He sat down and started reading where he left off.
Not much after, he heard footsteps coming down the stairs. He saw Dean, wearing only a shirt and boxers, and carrying a pillow and blanket with him.
Dean set up a place to sleep on the couch. He sat down and turned on the TV. Half an hour later, he fell asleep.
Castiel stayed up reading until the sun came up. At about six o’clock, he grabbed the book and brought it back upstairs with him. He fell asleep reading about rabbits’ feet.
Part 3
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I was going to update tomorrow, but I wasn't able to finish editing the next part in time. It'll probably be up next week. :)
Thanks for reading the chapter!